^A _R ^E _Y ^O _U ^S _I ^T _T ^I _N ^G _C ^O _M ^F _O ^R _T ^A _B ^L _Y ^?

It all started when I went to the Hammerlock School of Wrestling for a week-long Summer Camp. I took along a tape of myself singing to Cher, to listen to before going to sleep. The other trainees wondered what I was listening to, took my tape and put it on the ghetto blaster. They were impressed by my rendition of "Summer Nights" (in which I play the parts of John Travolta and Oliva Newton-John, and dragged me over to the coaches dormitory to perform in front of them live. The day after I was persuaded to put on a show in the middle of the wrestling ring. This became a regular occurence and I also performed in the local pub and a fitness centre! At the end of the camp, we were all given ring names - and Ian "The Karaoke Kid" Bowden was born!

The next summer my hidden talent was shown in public once again when I sang at my neighbours' two barbecues. My performance was only outshone by my neighbour bouncing her tits to "I Want to be a Hippy". After finding out that my local pub ran karaoke nights, I decided to perform in a new environment. With the aid of a blond wig, I have sung "Summer Nights" and "Hopelessly Devoted to You" to thunderous applause.

I originally planned to share my talent with the World Wide Web but the .Wav files are 2.5MB each - that's a lot of free webspace used up and a long download time! If you are interested in hearing me sing then please send and large SAE and I will post you a strait-jacket and I will mail the file back. The following are available:

SONG		ORIGINAL ARTIST
Summer Nights		John Travolta & Olivia Newton-John
Hopelessly Devoted To You		Olivia Newton-John
Eternal Flame		Bangles
Two Become One		Spice Girls

I also sing some using my normal voice but they are not as comical. Please note that I am a hot-blooded, heterosexual male and I have not been kicked in the nads!